Believing God!

Believing God!

From my early childhood I have always believed in God, because both of my parents were true believer in God. Now I have grown up enough to think logically about the existence of God, but still without any doubt I still believe in him. May be this is the way I am brought up.

But there is a difference between worshiping God now and at that time .Earlier I never thought that God listens to me, or he will fulfill my dreams. May be it was because at that time, my parents were enough to provide me any thing. Never thought of any thing which could be denied by them, neither did I ever hesitate in asking any thing. Comparing to today’s time, I find many thing which I can’t ask openly from any one. I have some personal needs, some extreme desires, about which I would like to talk to some one. But when I look around I find no one. Earlier my mother was always there to listen to my each and every small problem, now I find myself lost. There are many things, about which I want to talk to some one, explain my pain, the problem through which I am going now. There are some problems in every one’s life, about which people want to talk, try to resolve the problem. But that can be done only when you feel comfortable to the person you are talking to.

This is the time, when beside my mother, God is the only one I can think about to talk to. It’s not that I feel that God will solve all my problems, its Just that I feel more comfortable telling him all my worries, all my pain, all my troubles. I feel like he will not only listen to me, but also would not judge me. He will think from my point of view, from my perspective. He will definitely understand how badly I need some thing, how important is some thing to me. I cry my heart out in front of him and feel relaxed. I feel like there is some one who understands me, listens to me and thinks like me.

To my mind all this is because of my personal weakness. I feel that people start believing in God out of weakness. When ever I feel weak I go to God, with a hope that I will get some happiness, that all my problems will be resolved.

This makes me feel very selfish. But at the same time, I always feel better, very relieved when I talk about my problems to God. At the same time it also makes me think, am I really true believer in God or it’s just my selfishness.