My Choice!
Life is never what you have thought for your self.At least for me.In some sense it is better than what I thought and in some sense worse than I thought it would be.Most part of my life is very pedestrian.I have a fixed routine for every thing.Read the news papers,read books,learn new words etc-etc which at times becomes very pedantic .The only excitement in my life is my daughter.
I feel the ineffable joy and happiness when I see my daughter walking,making baby noises and roaming around the house .At the same time ,I also think about my parents especially my mother who must have done nothing less for me than what I am doing for my daughter right now .After becoming a mother myself ,I understand the emotions very well which was just hidden inside me for a long time.2-3 days back my mother was very ill,she was almost at the verge of crying when I talked to her.Even though she knew that I wont be able to do anything for her still she could not stop herself from telling me every thing.I felt helpless and the first thing came to my mind was that will my daughter also be in the same situation one day .I become very pensive when ever I think about my mother who loves me with all her heart.
I feel I have too much dependency, both emotional and financial .I have very few of my own likes and dislikes .I am enjoying all the colors of motherhood but I do not wish for this kind of life for my daughter.I want her to be independent both financially and most importantly emotionally.Caring for every one else is good but not at the cost of giving yourself pain and anguish and making just every one else happy.
There are several emotional,physical and mental requirements.There should be some kind of rule to prioritize them.Need to decide which emotions,you are going to let fall by the way side and which ones you are going to embrace.That way life will become easier and less painful.
I feel the ineffable joy and happiness when I see my daughter walking,making baby noises and roaming around the house .At the same time ,I also think about my parents especially my mother who must have done nothing less for me than what I am doing for my daughter right now .After becoming a mother myself ,I understand the emotions very well which was just hidden inside me for a long time.2-3 days back my mother was very ill,she was almost at the verge of crying when I talked to her.Even though she knew that I wont be able to do anything for her still she could not stop herself from telling me every thing.I felt helpless and the first thing came to my mind was that will my daughter also be in the same situation one day .I become very pensive when ever I think about my mother who loves me with all her heart.
I feel I have too much dependency, both emotional and financial .I have very few of my own likes and dislikes .I am enjoying all the colors of motherhood but I do not wish for this kind of life for my daughter.I want her to be independent both financially and most importantly emotionally.Caring for every one else is good but not at the cost of giving yourself pain and anguish and making just every one else happy.
There are several emotional,physical and mental requirements.There should be some kind of rule to prioritize them.Need to decide which emotions,you are going to let fall by the way side and which ones you are going to embrace.That way life will become easier and less painful.
You are a great woman.I too think life is full of choices you make. The life of an Indian woman goes in fulfilling the needs of other.Are u from iit? plz follow my blog on google friend connect and talk more.
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